PRL Serials

3. BLACK MAN (Butcher Brown, Michael Millions)

Joel “Jo” David Livingston retired from the US Navy when he turned forty years old. He was proud of his career, but he was happy to be free of its duties when he was done. The navy had given him everything he wanted for himself and his children; he’d traveled the world, earned two engineering degrees, and managed to accumulate wealth that allowed him to take his wife on lavish vacations and to pass down something to his off-spring. 

He was and has always been the best father anyone could ask for. My brother and I are very different people, but we are both very much our father’s sons. We both look like him. We both have his eyes, dark brown and brooding, and we have his jawline that makes him handsome and picture-perfect in his uniform. My brother, Cedric, looks more like him because they are both darker skinned and I share the high yellow complexion of my mother. 

“Come on, Tommy,” my dad said to my uncle with obvious annoyance. “These two knuckleheads are lost causes, but I thought the patch was working?”

“Whoa, hold on,” I said defensively. “You trying to save uncle Thomas but you gave up on us?”

“I raised y’all fools not to smoke and look at you,” he said. “I can’t do nothing for y’all now that y’all grown. But I’mma save my brother so when my stupid sons die because they don’t have the will power to quit smoking, we can stand together at your funerals.”

I shook my head. “Doom and gloom much, pop?”

“I’m just saying,” he said as he grabbed a cigarette from the box, put it behind his ear, and threw the pack back to my uncle. “I gotta be harsh or y’all don’t listen. I really don’t wanna bury my kids.” 

“I see you kept a cigarette,” Cedric pointed out.

“But did I light it up?” my father asked righteously and he didn’t allow time for a response before he continued, “Alright then. So what y’all talking about that’s so important that we ain’t doing what we all came here to do?”

“Something a lot more important,” Cedric said sincerely. “We talking about Uncle Thomas’s sex life. Or we was, before they got all in my business.”

“How is that more important than Thanksgiving dinner?” 

“‘Cause,” Cedric continued, “I’ve known this man my whole life and I just now found out he gay. Don’t you think that’s something we should be talking about? I want my uncle to know I love and accept him, and he got some relationship wisdom for me that I can admit I need.”

When Cedric mentioned that my uncle was gay, I looked to my dad to guage his reaction. Had my uncle Thomas come out to my dad by that point?

“Tommy?” my dad said and I could hear in his voice, see in his eyes, that this was news to him. 

My uncle smiled nervously and scratched the back of his head. He took a long drag of his cigarette.

“I been meaning to talk to you about it,” he said eventually. 

I made eye contact with Cedric and tried to engage the unspoken language that siblings sometimes share where they can communicate feelings and intentions with facial expressions, and I tried to convey to my brother that we should give our dad and uncle some space to talk.

“What’s up with yo face, bruh?” Cedric said, interrupting the admittedly stalled conversation between the older set of brothers. 

“Nothing,” I said with exasperation. I honestly wanted to hear the conversation between my father and uncle so I just ignored Cedric and tried to be quiet and spectate.

“How we almost fifty and we ain’t never talked about you being gay?” my dad asked. “I made you uncomfortable?”

“It wasn’t just you. It was daddy mostly,” uncle Thomas said and this made both men chuckle. “But, it was me too. I guess I just didn’t want it to be weird between us. I didn’t want you to think that we didn’t have anything in common. We ain’t always seen eye to eye, and over the years we got closer as people, and I guess I thought me coming out might make it weird or something.”

My dad nodded. “I mean, I always thought that maybe you were gay, that’s why you’re not married or whatever, but I figured after all these years, after everything, you would have told me by now. You know I love you, bruh, you being gay ain’t gone change nothing but make us closer.”

My dad hugged my uncle Thomas and the two said things in their embrace that made the other laugh. It was very touching to watch the two of them, and I wandered over to put an arm around my brother. 

“The fuck…” Cedric said like I had spooked him. He had been watching our father and uncle as well. 

“Let me love you brother,” I said and forced a hug between the two of us. 

“You know you can be honest with me, too, bruh,” Cedric said while we hugged. “You can be yourself, loud and proud, and I’ll love you no matter what.”

“Ced, I’m married to Valeria. I have two daughters.”

“Some people do a lot to cover up,” he said. “And I don’t know how you let a bad one like Loren get away, I was sure you wasn’t into women when you told me you was divorcing her.”

“You’re an idiot,” I said to my brother and we both turned our attention to the older pair of brothers. 

“So you’re seeing somebody?” my dad was saying. “In all these years I ain’t never known you to be in a relationship, I just assumed that wasn’t your thing, and you said as much before.”

“Yeah, those are the lies you tell yourself when you’re afraid how your family will react to you bringing home a boyfriend. Honestly, I really haven’t had many relationships and I think I was afraid to be in a relationship because I didn’t want to disappoint someone who would introduce me to their family when I didn’t feel comfortable to do the same.”

My dad nodded. “Daddy would’ve had a problem with it, hell he probably still will. I get it brother, it must not have been easy for you. I wish I could have been a better brother to you…”

“Nah, don’t do that,” uncle Thomas interrupted.

“No seriously, if we could have talked about all this when we was younger, I could have helped you. I would have helped you. I mean…” my dad looked painted for a moment. “I wasn’t all that open to gay people growing up, I probably bullied some people over the years. I guess I wish, I don’t know, I just wish you hadn’t had to hide yourself all these years. I really do love you, Tommy.”

“I’m sorry to break up the love fest,” Cedric said. 

“Then don’t,” I said. 

“Shut up, Wes. I’m glad y’all finally having this moment, but we was talking about who uncle seeing now. I want to hear about him. You should invite him to Thanksgiving, we all want to meet the guy that thinks he’s good enough for our uncle Thomas.”

“I’m not really seeing anybody,” he said. “It’s just a guy I’ve been talking to since the summer. He’s nice. He was in the army,” he said to my dad.

“Oh,” my dad said with genuine interest. “You should invite him for tomorrow, it’d be good to meet him.”

“He lives in New York, I doubt he could make it even if I did invite him. Plus I don’t think we’ve been talking long enough to meet family and spend holidays together. I’ll admit that I don’t have a lot of experience with relationships, but I’m pretty sure we’re not there yet.”

“Have you ever been in a relationship with somebody?” my dad asked.

My uncle looked at me and I knew that it was a long story.

“Well, yeah actually. You remember that guy I introduced you to when you visited me in Europe, Petar?”

My dad nodded, but before he could elaborate, a big black truck did the motor vehicle equivalent of storming into my grandfather’s driveway. It was paved, to a point, and when the truck made it to the gravel portion of the driveway, there was a flurry of dust in its wake. 

It was my sister, Ruby, and after she parked, she got out of the truck and slammed the door angrily behind her.

“So y’all decided not to invite me to the meat conference,” she said with aggression when she stood among us. She slapped the cigarette out of Ced’s hand and I laughed out loud until she slapped the back of my head hard enough that it made a sound.