PRL Serials

Zacchaeus had felt this before. 

He was at the Canned Heat for his eighteenth birthday and the backroom was full of his adult friends who didn’t care that he wasn’t legally allowed to drink. He’d been going to the Canned Heat since the first time he beat Mavis Turner at a game of Tunk, and the drunk patrons of the bar looked out for him so he wasn’t exposed to the worst things that happened in that environment. And no one tolerated him drinking, anyone that didn’t respect that was banned from the bar by the other drunks who knew better. But when he turned eighteen, Zacchaeus was old enough to drink around people who loved and cared for him, namely the drunks of the Canned Heat, and even Mavis Turner couldn’t stop the party that raged in the backroom from just before sunset until sunrise the next day. 

Zacchaeus enjoyed the entirety of the party. Even though he hadn’t been allowed to drink in the Canned Heat before, Zacchaeus and friends his age had tried alcohol before and he was excited to finally sit down to games with the patrons of the Canned Heat and enjoy the same drinks that they did. His favorite were the sweetest mixed drinks that the bartenders poured extra strong for him, and he nursed a beer like the seasoned drinkers. He was drunker than he realized and if not for the copious amounts of food in the backroom, he may not have made it to sunrise. But he staggered out of the backroom into the rising sunlight with other drunks who normally spent their nights at card tables. He had a smile on his face and he looked up into the sun with his eyes closed. Then he bent over and vomited a stream that, as he told other people in anecdotes about that birthday, lifted him off his feet. He swears that he vomited for a solid fifteen minutes with quick breaks to inhale, and that the drunks who walked him home would corroborate that by the time he was done, there was a prominent puddle of alcohol and bar food behind the Canned Heat for a week.   

After expelling the black oil on the planet-sized ship known as Top, Zacchaeus was exhausted and he crumpled to his knees. But he was impressed that he had out done his eighteenth birthday.

“Are you alright?” Zacchaeus heard a female voice call from above him. The vision of the dark-skinned, black winged woman was striking and he was suddenly embarrassed that he was so weak. “I am Pultine,” she introduced herself. “What has happened? Is that Minyak?”

Zacchaeus wiped his mouth and struggled up to his feet. When he was standing, he realized all of the eyes on him from a distance. He saw Issac and Maxx standing closer than everyone else and he realized that he had no idea what he had expelled from his body.

“You in there?” Zacchaeus asked the Needy and he was nervous for a moment that he only heard his own thoughts in his head. 

I am here, the Needy said inside of his mind after a moment. But I am mostly in the Fonlands. I transported much of Minyak’s being there for digestion. What you have expelled in the spillover, the remaining form of Minyak. I must go back to ensure that there are no traces of his consciousness in my being in the caves. You can handle it from here. Call me if you need me.

Then, for the first time in a long time, Zaccaheues was alone inside of his head. When the form of Minyak rose from the puddle of oil, Zacchaeus released his black cloak and a hood covered his head. Three black cards appeared in his raised right hand and a curved black blade in the other. 

“You intend to cut me, Zacchaeus?” Minyak yelled when he was a tall black form.

Zacchaeus charged at Minyak and as he gathered a large hand in the shape of of a black hammer that he swung quickly, Zacchaeus ducked under it, and spun quickly to jam the black dagger into the hammer fist, then he jumped away as the black cards rained down from his right hand and lodged into Minyak’s neck, shoulder, and abdomen.

“Tricks will not save the Archangels,” Minyak said as Zacchaeus retreated. “You do not need to risk yourself for them…”

The dagger that Zacchaeus jammed into the hammer fist exploded like sticky tar in the form of a web as each of the black cards exploded to deform Minyak. Before he could reconstitute, the tar of the dagger wrapped the deformed body and seemed to harden. Minyak was an ebony statue and it fell in the grass as it hardened, then shattered into many black pieces. 

Issac was the first to reach him and Maxx was not far behind. Pultine landed next to Maxx and they all smiled at him.

“That was impressive,” Issac said. “It’s always nice to see you take control.”

“I think it’s just me for a while,” Zacchaeus explained and they all listened with concern as he told them what the Needy was up to. “I still have power, I am the Needy, but it’s just me now.”

“Then I think it’s time we get back to Bludon,” Pultine said to Maxx. 

He nodded and turned to Zacchaeus. “Pultine will come with us to Bludon, if you will join me. I could use your help. Minyak may be done here, but he is something else on the surface.”

“Still?” Zacchaeus said with exasperation. “What the fuck?”

“I want to go to the Fonlands to monitor the Needy,” Issac said. “Can someone take me to the Smiting Chamber?” he asked Pultine. 

“I will take you,” she said, then looked to Maxx and Zacchaeus. “I will meet you all on Bludon.” Then she cast a portal and the two were gone in the blink of an eye. 

“What’s happening on Bludon?” Zacchaeus asked. 

Maxx shook his head. “It’s bad. I don’t know exactly what we can do, but I’m glad that you’re with me.”

The show of emotion was strange to Zacchaeus, it wasn’t like the Superguardian to show vulnerability, and when he hugged Zacchaeus, he realized that he had made a true friend.

“I was worried that you wouldn’t pull through,” Maxx admitted. “I’m so happy that you did.”

Zacchaeus patted Maxx’s shell. “It’ll take more than Minyak to get rid of me. Let’s get to Bludon.”

When Issac Washington, the Master of Multiversal Arcana, and Pultine, Two of the First Three and former Supreme Mmoatia, arrived to the Smiting Chamber, they were confused by what they saw. 

“Yana?” Pultine called as the two approached the heptagon at the center of the large Cavern that glowed Essence blue like the chaotic mist that surrounded Yana, leaving her bat-like head exposed at the top of it.

“Owuo,” Issac said as they stopped to face Owuo, who stood in front of Yana on the heptagon. There was a large projection created by the mist between them and the heptagon and it showed a close up of Zacchaeus and Maxx as they traveled to the surface of Bludon. 

“Surprising to see you here,” Owuo said with a smirk on his lips. “The Needy is fine, Minyak no longer exists inside of him, and he is no threat to the caves of Sakpata. So go back to the story, I’m sure our players could use a vague and pedantic pep talk.”

Isaac bawled both his fists and lines of navy blue energy circled them. 

“Why did you bring us here?” Issac asked with his jaw clenched as he controlled the urge to attack Owuo, who was very smug. 

“I thought this one brought you here,” Owuo said and made a dismissive gesture at Pultine.

“You know what I mean,” Issac barked and the sudden outburst made the patronizing smile on Owuo’s face grow two sizes. Issac took a deep breath to calm himself, he wouldn’t let evil goad him. “You didn’t bring Wazad and I to the Fonlands by accident, you said as much on Bludon. We have been here for so long because your judgment has proven beneficial to the beings of this universe, and to mine or else my powers would not have allowed me to dwell here as long as I have.”

“Maybe while you have been away, I have ravaged your world and you will return to something worse than you can imagine,” Owuo said evenly. 

“Maybe you are not the same evil abosom that I read about,” Issac said. 

“I assure you that I am everything you have heard and everything you cannot imagine,” Owuo quipped.

“Owuo, stop flirting with that Earther,” Yana yelled from the mist. She had disappeared inside of it and then she emerged from the front of it and walked through the projection that continued to play.      

“Why are you with this thing?” Pultine asked her.

“He is helping me save the multiverse,” Yana said. “The Earther is very perceptive, Owuo has subverted his true nature for a time out of respect for the game of Smiting. He is an agent of the Chamber that has identified a threat to every existence and until the multiverse is secured, he is under my very substantial wings.”

“Whatever you say,” Pultine said dismissively. “I hate stuff like this, it sounds like Supreme stuff. I trust that you are handling everything and if I can be of service, you know I am a loyal servant of the Queen of the Caves.” She turned to Issac. “Shall we make our way to Bludon? Apparently the Needy is nothing to worry about.”

“He isn’t going anywhere, are you, Master of Multiversal Arcana?” Owuo asked with a very strong hint of annoyance in his voice. 

“You know me so well. If you all don’t mind, I would like to better understand the reasons my friends and I are here, and if possible, what the future holds.”

“You can stay, Earther,” Yana said. “I would like a chance to flirt with you as well. And I sense an immense power from you.”

Pultine ported to Bludon and Issac took his place beside Owuo as Yana returned to the heptagon.